i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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