these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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