You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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