if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize