she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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