its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Let's paint friendship bongs
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
How naked do you want me to be?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
