i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
well you can't waste a boner
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
