so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Randomize
