um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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