do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
