before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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