honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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