My friends, they love my intelligence
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
21 Times Karma Showed These People Not to Mess Around
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?