I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
