Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
