Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
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