There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
did you just send me my own nude
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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