are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
