I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
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