Me. At least after what I've been through.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
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I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
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He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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