I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Randomize
