I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Randomize
