honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
