Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
