I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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