the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
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