found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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