you're like a bully in the Christmas story
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
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Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
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Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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