She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
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