um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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