He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
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