I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
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I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
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But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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