I wannas sexs uuuuu
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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