With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
