in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
