We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize