i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize