Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
