My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
