now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize