whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize