I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO