That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
