i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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