she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
This is the high leading the old right now
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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