I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Randomize
