we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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