His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
