Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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