some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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