Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
