Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize