party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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